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Franks B.D. 1994. What Is Stress QUEST 46 1 Article
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Autistic Children and Parental Stress
Parents have plenty of stress just dealing with everyday issues such as meal preparation, homework, shopping, and other parenting responsibilities. Those can be complicated even more by stress between parents and stress between a parent and child. Conflict happens when a parent tries to keep a child safe and look out for their health, happiness, and safety and the child resists those attempts.
Studies report that parents with autistic children have more stress than parents with children who have Down's syndrome or mental retardation. This could be because an autistic child cannot express even their most basic wants and needs. Parents have to try to figure out what the child needs leaving both the parent and the child frustrated. An autistic child when frustrated can become aggressive to others or may even harm itself.
Parents face many challenges when they have an autistic child. Mealtimes can become stressful because of the inability to sit for the entire mealtime by the child. Bedtimes can be stressful because of the child having difficulty sleeping. Normal family relationships can be disrupted. One parent may have to take a sibling to a baseball practice while the other parent stays at home with the autistic child. A strain may form on the marriages because of the time that needs to be spent in caring for an autistic child. Parents may be reluctant to take their child to family and friend's homes because the child does not behave well if not in their own environment.
A parent may face stress because society has a difficult time accepting children who are "different." The public may stare, point fingers, or not understand when the child does something that is not socially acceptable. Holidays may be especially stressful for parents because they are unable to take part in family parties or social gatherings. They may feel socially isolated from friends and family and that adds to the ever-present stress of parenting.
One other concern that can cause extra stress is a worry over future care for their autistic child. Their families may not choose to accept responsibility for an autistic child if something should happen to the parents. Parents will worry that their child will not receive acceptable care if they are not around to provide the care.
Another serious stressor is the fact they do not have a typical child. Their child has special needs and special caring. They may mourn the loss of a child who will mature normally, have a social life, and go to a regular school. This can be an emotional loss that can cause a strain on family relationships. They may be stressed because their life is not what they imagined it would be when they began a family. This endless distress and grief can cause chronic sorrow and cause frustration, psychological stress, and be depressing. Families may also worry about finances because of the extra programs an autistic child may need, extra care giving, and because one parent may have to give up a job to care for their autistic child.
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